A simple phone call...

Today was the two year anniversary of my and Tyler's wedding. After work, I went down to the pool just to reflect and have some alone time. I realized that this date wasn't as raw for me as it was last year, it was still somewhat sad, but time has definitely been healing my wounds and this anniversary was much easier than last.

While I was sitting at the pool, my parents called to let me know that they had been thinking of me today, as they knew that it may be a sad day for me. Their sweet, simple act of calling, just to let me know I was on their minds, meant the world to me. As I write this, I am brought to tears, not so much over the sadness of my divorce, but more so by the overwhelming feeling of love that I have for the both of them, and that I know they have for me in return.

Their phone call today was such a good reminder to me of the importance of family and how families love and support one another. I think that this factor struck me even more so today than it would have normally, because today I find myself in a new place, with new people - who don't truly know me - nor I them. And so this evening, when I received their phone call, it reaffirmed the fact that no matter where I am my family will always be there for me, loving and supporting me from afar. That I may be off adventuring in Florida, or Mexico, or Belize, but whatever happens, they will always be there...and for me, that was a great thing to be reminded of.

Charlie

Today was a sad day.
Today I said goodbye to my sweet cat Charlie.
We have been through a lot together this cat and I.
I got Charlie when I was in college and he was
only nine weeks old.

He was so little. And so sweet.

Then he grew up and got big - but thought that he was still little - and we would come home to find him curled up in boxes that were much too small for him.


Then we moved him to Kirksville where we were all a little family for awhile.

But then our family fell apart and all of a sudden it was just Charlie and I again. Charlie was so sweet to me during that time and would snuggle me and love me and in his own way helped to take care of me. I remember many days of crying on the couch and him coming up and snuggling into me and giving me his love. Every night he would sleep with me, curled up in the crook of my legs. And every time that I would come home he would greet me at the door, give me a friendly "welcome home meow", and lay on the ground like this, hoping for a belly rub.

Having to give him up has been one of the hardest parts of this entire job transition. However, I found a great couple (Paul and Chika) who wanted to take him and who are so excited to have him and love him. I am so grateful for them as it makes it a little bit easier knowing that he is going to a good home. Here is a picture of Paul, Chika and I. Chika works at Trader Joes with me and is one of the sweetest girls I know.
Look at my face, I have this look of "I am totally faking being excited to give you my cat" ha.

Here I am giving Charlie one last kiss. When he left I bawled like a baby. Now that he is gone, I can't wait to get out of this house as it is so lonely without his presence. I am going to miss him, as I think that he took care of me just as much as I took care of him....he was my little lover....

February 2, 2004

I have a week left in Minneapolis and today I am starting to pack up my house to get ready to move. As a rule, I am a terrible packer, because I always get distracted by reading old journals, looking at old pictures, reminiscing about my life, looking through old books....seriously when I pack alone, it takes me forever.

So today while I was supposed to be diligently packing, I came across an old journal of mine and I flipped open to the following journal entry. I read it and couldn't believe what I had written.

Feb. 2, 2004
"Tonight I received an email from Greta and it was all about her adventures in Mexico. While reading it, my longing for adventure became more intense. There is something inside of me that feels like I need to go somewhere alone, by myself for awhile. I need to take an adventure - my basic self is craving it. I want to be completely independent and have adventures and be free. I want to be on my own and not have attachment. I want to find my true self - and perhaps I have to do that without Tyler....."

I read that and was like "holy crap, how spooky". I have been wanting this ever since then, knowing that this was someday coming and that I had to do it without Tyler....There was a part of me that knew. Knew that this was my life plan. Reading that helps to reiterate why I am leaving, why I am going to Mexico, why I am going on this adventure alone....it's because I have always wanted it. It has always been part of my plan - it's just that I got side-tracked for awhile.